Wednesday, 24 July 2013


Ok guys i'm going to be honest at the moment creatively i have been feeling a little lacklustre, And mostly because i am unemployed. Who would have thought being an adult was going to be so hard???

Insert Care Free Baby :) Yes it is me.

And yet from last year i am so much happier! who would have thunk?  I made a brave decision a few years a go to give up my job and follow my dream and while i say brave i mean really putting myself out there, I mean let's be honest i gave up a full time job with not so bad money with chances to be a manager anywhere i wanted and maybe if i stayed with that i would have my own place, possibly savings or maybe actually have the funds to get married! But instead i walked away and put myself back into education. Skip ahead to three years later.. Still living with my parents my partner having to come for sleepovers!! Like i'm 15. So why i am i the most happiest than i have ever been??? I think the answer really lies in money does not buy happiness, while yes i know that it is easy for me to say that while i technically sponge of the most wonderfullist best mother in the world ;) For all purposes i am skint, What i do get i work hard for i love a little treat to myself after some serious hefty hard work.

I am now meeting an working with as many people as i can too build a great body of work and may i add just because sometimes it's free it is still WORK i cannot stress that enough. I know if i work hard enough the risk of being bold and giving up a cushy job to follow my dreams will pay off i am still aware that life is not a disney cartoon and in 80 minutes my dreams will come true and i can gallantly sing in fields. Truth is since leaving education i have worked the hardest i have ever worked and most of it free/expenses and i have learnt so much in the last year that i will not be ungrateful or mocked for it.

Onset Of Blood Loyal

While i am not saying hey everyone let's quit or jobs and follow our dreams not that i am saying every dream is not attainable but some realism is required and a lot of effort.

Some Days i feel like throwing in the towel and becoming a regular adult, some feel like i feel i will never be inspired being unemployed can drain you of energy and forget how lucky you are! So on your throw in the preverbal towel days use your unemployment to your advantage you have no timetable go and live life DO NOT sit there and wallow! Plus side weekdays everywhere is quieter, Go to that museum you have been wanting to visit but have put off, Go to the shows that will make you smile. I have lately become obsessed with taking pictures of everything so i just take my camera and myself off and remind my self life is pretty damn great. I was also able to take myself off to London for the tennis at queens club Ageon championships which was an amazing cultural eyeopener, If you have been to places like that you will know what i mean.

That always spurs me on and gets the creative juices flowing again while i am trying to start my own business it is going to be a long hard slog so why not enjoy the process and try not to kill myself over the anxiety to be like all my friends who own homes have the white fence husband and children, I have to remind myself that is there dream they worked hard for not mine.

So i apologise that got a little lengthy but i wanted to share with you that all my days are not amazing, I don't spend all day on glamorous sets, Some days it's just me and some weeks too it's just pushing yourself through the dry spell and being fabulous in your own way.

Huge love too all my unemployed pals